As I’m sure all of you guys know, going out to eat instead of cooking meals at home is EXPENSIVE! Even just two people going out to eat 3 times a week (spending an average of $7 per person) adds up to $2,184 a year. But what do you do if you don’t know how to cook?
That was me. When my husband and I first got married almost 10 years ago, I had no idea how to cook. None. At all.
I was so busy with band, choir, tennis, school, and tons of other activities in high school that I just never watched my mom cook. It’s not that I chose not to watch her and learn how to cook, it honestly just never crossed my mind. Then I went to college and, seriously… who cooks in college?
So when I got married the summer after my sophomore year, I was completely clueless.
I still remember my first attempt at a “home-cooked meal”. I had bought one of those box meals that has the rice, spices and sauce in it. All you have to do is add the chicken. So you put the rice/spices in the bottom of a 9×13 pan, pour a specified amount of water in, lay the boneless/skinless chicken breasts on top of the rice, pour the sauce over the chicken, and then bake. Easy enough, right? I cooked it for the right amount of time and it came out looking and smelling wonderful! Ryan and I sat down for dinner and cut into the chicken, only to find that it was still VERY pink through the middle. Oh…. wait…. you’re supposed to THAW the chicken before you put it on the rice??? Yeah, I was clueless. BUT, lesson #1 was learned: thaw meat before you cook it!
One of our wedding presents from my mom was a recipe book with several of the recipes that she had made for us growing up. Several of my favorite recipes (like Homemade Chicken & Dumplings) were in there, so I was excited to try some! I knew exactly what these recipes were supposed to look and taste like, so I felt more confident trying these first (BTW, recipe books without pictures are one of my BIGGEST pet peeves!) There were a few recipes that I got correct right off the bat (like the Hawaiian Chicken) and then some that took me several attempts to master. But through my trial and error, lesson #2 was learned: If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again!
So at that point I had a few recipes under my belt and I could make a pretty mean spaghetti (i.e. ground meat and Ragu)…. but I was in desperate need of more options. I’m still amazed that I never once thought during my high school/college years, “Hey, it might be a good idea if I learn how to cook BEFORE I get married.” Not once. {sigh}
My next discovery was the Betty Crocker Cooking Basics Cookbook (I have the 1998 version, the one I linked to is the 2008 version). I’m pretty sure we got this as a wedding present, but it didn’t come off the bookshelf until at least year 2 of our marriage. This cookbook has huge, colorful pictures of every recipe, as well as step-by-step instructions for all kinds of basic cooking skills. With the Cooking Basics Cookbook I learned how to broil/grill/pan sear meat, make a glaze, make bread crumbs, cook fish, steam asparagus, make baked potato wedges, okay… I really could go on and on. This cookbook was a lifesaver for me, and I would recommend it to anyone starting out their learning to cook journey. So… to the wonderful lady that got us this cookbook…. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!! 
After going through the Basics Cookbook, I had the confidence to try more things, and even to change some things up (like using different spices from what the recipe called for). These next few years weren’t without error, but it was such a huge learning experience to try different things.
I have definitely learned to enjoy cooking (other than when I’m pregnant), but I am still FAR from a master chef. I watched Julie & Julia a couple of months ago and, oh my… the things that they made were just incredible! I really don’t think I will ever, EVER be at that level. But I love experimenting with different spices and recipes, and I’m no longer fearful of failing.
That is probably the biggest thing that I’ve learned in my cooking journey: it’s okay to fail. It’s okay to fail a lot. But if you keep trying, you will get it and you will be so glad that you didn’t give up!
I am truly so grateful for my mega-gracious husband who has eaten all of my experiments over the past 10 years. He has even eaten things that I wouldn’t eat! As far as I still have to go, I definitely wouldn’t be where I am in the cooking-realm without his support and patience.
So, that’s my journey so far. I still have TONS of things that I want to learn (like canning, sprouting, gardening, and making my own pasta, to name a few) and I look forward to looking back in another ten years and seeing all of the new recipes that I have under my belt!
What’s your cooking story? I would love to hear it!
That was me too! I made a Banquet Homestyle Bakes boxed meal for our very first “married meal” and was quite proud of myself! lol!
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@Stephanie @ Couponing 101, Yep, I definitely used those for sure! I honestly don’t know what all we ate that first year of marriage… maybe just boxed meals? And spaghetti… that has always been a staple meal around here and it’s actually something Ryan can make without any help!
So, I must admit I was pretty nervous for the first few years when you would try out new things (it’s not like I was any help since I was, and still am, completely clueless about cooking!). But you have morphed well (isn’t that romantic?) into an AMAZING cook! Thank you for trying and trying and not giving up sweety, as I am almost daily blessed by your wonderful cooking. It was and continues to be a fun journey!
@Ryan, You don’t give yourself enough credit — you make some great spaghetti and INCREDIBLE strawberry pancakes!!
I was baking a cake once and it said to put in the egg whites.
I put in the egg shells because they were white and the egg
whites weren’t cooked and were clear. Pictures are a must
in my opinion!! I still have a hard time so easy, simple step
by step instructions along with pictures are very helpful!!
@Jennifer, LOL!!! Jennifer, that is awesome. It makes sense though… egg white should equal the white part of the egg!
Okay, so I began learning to cook when I was very young, and I have been cooking on my own for a long time now.
But, a lot of it was Hamburger Helper meals and macaroni-and-cheese from a box. While these are not BAD, in the last few years, I have broken away from these “crutches,” and I now make my own creations
Love this post, Rach!
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@Amy@Amy Loves It!, Oh we have had our share of hamburger helper too. Then one day I looked at the salt content and it was insane!! Seriously… I’m sure it would taste just as good without the crazy amount of salt.
Companies frustrate me… you can have easy and cheap, but if you want easy and healthy then you have to pay big bucks. {sigh}
When I read this post I laughted to hard I fell out of my chair I grew up watching everyone around me cook and I love to cook mix and come up with my own its fun
Our first ‘married’ meal was boiled cabbage with sausages and jiffy cornbread. It was super cheap and we could eat it on the same batch for several nights. After a couple years of that three times a week we both developed a serious aversion to boiled cabbage. Ugh…just thinking about it makes my stomach turn.
@Heather, That actually sounds incredible!! Boiled cabbage and sausage is one of my favorites. Although, I can imagine after a few years of having it all the time you might get a little tired of it.
But I think I’m going to be making it soon!!
When my mom got married, all she knew to do was boil water….apparently she had never ever cooked. Thankfully I got married a bit older, so I knew some basic meals that I still stick too
My hubby might be sick of them…..kind of like the “Lemon Chicken” in Everybody Loves Raymond!
I’ve got to see Julie & Julia!!!
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This is a great post, because so many people can relate to it. I totally agree on not being afraid to fail. Once you get over the fear of failing in cooking, it is so much easier. Even the best of cooks have failures. It is all about trial and error and learning what works and tastes best for you and your family.
@Lynn, I am truly so thankful for bloggers like you and others who help to make cooking so easy!! I absolutely MUST try making a cake with ganache soon…. maybe topped with some toasted coconut!
How about a cooking class? They’re often cheap or free at stores and at local adult or community schools, and you learn techniques, not just recipes. They really serve you well and vary the routine.
That’s young to get married!!! It must have been a challenge to finish college and be in the early stages of marriage. I didn’t go that route — wanted to see the world and I did — and now I cook the cuisines I tasted in far-off lands. It’s a great memory that adds to the experience of dining.
@mar, I would LOVEEEEEE to take a cooking class. It’s been on my to-do list for several years, and hopefully one day I’ll be able to take one.
LOL, yes, we definitely did get married young. While there are times that I think it would’ve been fun to be able to travel some before getting married, I do cherish the memories of my husband and I both being in college and up studying together late and just having a lot more freedom than the “real life” world offers. Maybe one day I’ll get to travel to those far off lands and learn some new cooking techniques!!
I’ve been married for 6 years (this month!), and I STILL can’t cook!
I even took a home ec cooking class one semester in junior high, for cryin’ out loud, so I was “paying attention”! My “specialty” is spaghetti, which I actually can make “from scratch” – aka open up assorted tomato product cans, and add some spices. Yep, that’s as sophisticated as it gets at my house, ooh-la-la, LOL! Thanks for this entertaining post, and way to go, you are much more adept with the cooking skills than some of us. 
one thing my mom did that i’m really thankful for is make us kids in charge of one dinner a week. we could pick what to make and mom would help us make it depending on our age and the skill level of the recipe. by the time i was in my first apartment i didn’t even think twice about cooking because i had always been doing it. i was shocked when some of my friends didn’t even know how to prepare a box of mac and cheese.
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